Greetings, To Anybody Out There,

I have to write this quickly.

I understand and have great sympathy for Sergeant Bergdahl  because for five years I have been held captive against my will by radical rogue Muslim elements right here on Batam island, Indonesia.

At all times, day and night, 24/7, I am watched by two hefty muscular Muslim thugs who have previously served as bouncers at the local masque. Those two brutes constantly watch, harass, and bully me while serving bad tasteless food, and will not allow me to leave my own apartment. Over years I may have written you in e-mails that I am fine, swim at the pool each day, walk about the grounds, but this is a falsehood. I have not left my dark curtains-drawn residence for five years. You do not have the faintest idea this is going on, but every mail I write is placed on hold, until a small group of censors make sure I maintain the cover story that I am healthy, fine, and just an old feeble-minded eccentric living alone, and everything here is normal. (It is practically a miracle I’m writing this without close scrutiny)  A Muslim bruiser is usually a few steps away with a machete or claw hammer in his possession.

When I do occasionally receive an Australian or British visitor. Our conversation is monitored and in some instances recorded making sure nothing is said out-of-place and am severely punished if I make the slightest slip; on leaving I never fail to have a tiny note prepared to slip into the visitor’s palm while shaking his hand goodbye, I alway write the same message “Help me I’m being held against my will by radical Muslims. Please contact the U. S. Embassy, I am helpless and cannot. Thank you.” Unfortunately nothing ever happens and the visitor never comes back because he or she is intimidated or as I have learned one or two have disappeared.

The Muslim group is holding me on the assumption they will acquire a ransom of $500,000 and a shipment of small arms, one of those small arms is an updated anti-aircraft shoulder fired rocket launcher (a FIM-8-92 Stinger) to be executed when relations between the U. S, and the Muslim Community here have deteriorate further. The group I’m held by is a dangerous element with direct connection to al Qaeda, and a Wing-Nut Afghan Taliban off-shoot: “Shariahah” which also includes conspirator members of our U.S. Ally, Pakistani Intelligence, the ISI, that are now positioned on Batam to plan and advise large-scale terrorist attacks on Singapore. While forced to assist in moving explosives by fishing boat, I eavesdropped to learn the target will be the Presidential Palace on Orchard Street on New Years Eve 2014 utilizing a septic tanker crammed with crap and high explosives.

Jim, Bill, Arny, Tom , George, Matthew, Jess, anyone out there, please save me by immediately contacting Washington DC, the State Department, the FBI, and anyone you can and tell them of my plight before it’s too late and lives are lost including my own. Bergdahl was lucky, he got out alive, I may not.

All the Best,